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Forum   Subject
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
P.S. My plan for today is to NOT obsess over this. Do whatever I can to distract myself. Stop procrastinating at work. Go for a walk at lunch. Do something fun with the kids tonight. Stop obsessing over how unfair, how unjust, what a victim I a
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: completely lost part 2 by watto14 @ 07/17/14 09:03 AM

as always 25, you are fantastic with the word. I think you would have been almost impressed at the way I handled myself in front of h last night, when he started talking I didn't interrupt(I usually do, especialy when i'm nervous or anxious, I liste
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Stand and Deliver! by LoisB @ 07/17/14 08:58 AM

Thank you Matt :-) Last night I became a bit obsessive and, at some point, cuckoo. I sent out a bunch more resumes for some practical...get money now...and, then, searched online for journalism, jobs in trade mags, publishing, etc...By this time, I
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Where next Mr Crazy Person by beatrice @ 07/17/14 08:57 AM

Update - the sun is shining, and I just got another letter from my xh's lawyers. Despite the fact that I asked that all correspondence is sent to my lawyer. I am just so very tired of all of this. It is almost nine years since he left me, we hav
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Ok, back on plan. I am just realizing that even though I have a million thoughts around what I want/need I don't need to put anything out there TONIGHT. That I should use the time to JUST LISTEN, NO MATTER WHAT H HAS TO SAY. It doesn't mean I don'
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell: Chapter Four by MLP @ 07/17/14 08:53 AM

Maybell - I think it's good that you're asking yourself those questions!! I ALSO think that it's possible that you're re-writing history in a moment of feeling discouraged. Give yourself some time to think about it and journal. Step back and loo
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell: Chapter Four by Ggrass @ 07/17/14 08:51 AM

^^^^^ I think I agree with just all of you. I do not want the old r back. The new version of h, is the old one of last year, he cannot accept the r has changed. Yet he has an ow? He seems to be in his head stuck in the r, but unable to be in it d
For Newcomers
Zues, It sounds like we have a bit in common. I tend to want to fast track every time line on earth. I keep having to go back through my calendar to see that this is all very very very new to me. Just three weeks ago I took a trip to New York and
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Old dog seeks new trick by MLP @ 07/17/14 08:43 AM

ODSNT.... I likened this experience the other day to my IC to the tides of the ocean. The waves come up and retreat, move forward and retreat...Sometimes the water is rough, and sometimes it's more gentle, but it's always moving. I hope you have a
Midlife Crisis
That's the rub, isn't it? We don't want social experiments with our kids! That's what my W is doing. She keeps telling me how, even though she is ripping my D14's life apart, my D14 "will be fine". I can see that she has no idea how to make
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Upwards Update - Life is good! by MLP @ 07/17/14 08:39 AM

Upwards - you sound great. Good on you. So glad to hear you're feeling so positive!
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell: Chapter Four by Meghan @ 07/17/14 08:29 AM

Maybell, I ask myself this a lot, too, and it's asked of me pretty regularly by friends and family. It's totally normal, and there are bound to be days when all you can see are the issues without a single good thing in sight. It's interesting that
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: I don't love you anymore by nova @ 07/17/14 08:16 AM

Thanks Ben. I need to remember to rule of believe none of what you hear and less than half of what you see. I've tried each time she's come over to act as "normal" as possible, just being myself and not showing my emotions. And I think you
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Dealing with WAW Part 2 by Maybell @ 07/17/14 08:15 AM

Wow, pilot, that's how it's done.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Is DB Worth It? Part 3 by claire7 @ 07/17/14 08:12 AM

Right back at you, Maybell. (( ))
Midlife Crisis
Georgia, When you learn to accept the MLCer for who he/she is today, it becomes a little easier not to have the expectations that you would have had if he/she was the pre-crisis personality. Continue to take the high road.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Is DB Worth It? Part 3 by Maybell @ 07/17/14 08:07 AM

Yes!! Don't you feel great? Claire I don't know what I would do here without you.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: 2nd time around part 3 by job @ 07/17/14 08:04 AM

If you feel comfortable in assisting him w/the applications and have no expectations, then I see no reason to say no since you've been doing them for a while...but he's got to learn how to do them for himself at some point, i.e., especially if there
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: "Speak Softly" The MLC Version by Georgiabelle @ 07/17/14 08:04 AM

^^^^^^^^ Excellent stuff as always!
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Is DB Worth It? Part 3 by claire7 @ 07/17/14 08:04 AM

Thanks, Maybell. And guess what? He got a babysitter so that he could go to a friend's b'day party. He will see her for a bit in the evening and babysitter will put her to sleep. And I will have a night and morning off and he will have to come ho
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell: Chapter Four by Maybell @ 07/17/14 08:02 AM

Claire, you're probably right. One more reason I need to find a job ASAP. To have more life of my own that doesn't hinge on him. Thank you all...
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: "Speak Softly" The MLC Version by job @ 07/17/14 07:59 AM

GG, I would remain dim for a while. If you reach out now, he may begin to wonder why you are doing so at this particular time. Everything he is doing is perfectly normal for those in replay. He's trying to recapture his youth and wants to see if h
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell: Chapter Four by claire7 @ 07/17/14 07:56 AM

Maybell I think about this so much. Just this morning in fact!! (So, yes, I'll say it is a normal feeling, because I want to be normal! Ha) I know I don't want my current H back. And I don't want our old R back. I know I am working hard to impr
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell: Chapter Four by Maybell @ 07/17/14 07:50 AM

Pilot, I don't know. Maybe. I started to be a WAS six years ago, but couldn't leave because I had a newborn and two toddlers. I found a way to pull myself together to stay and work on the marriage but most of what I wrote IS true -- especially the co
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Finding my way - part 2 by Meghan @ 07/17/14 07:49 AM

Journaling: Last night was better than the one before in some respects. I got in a run, had some dinner, took a bath, read a novel, and watched a documentary that I was looking forward to that H. had no interest in seeing. Unfortunately, I was sear
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