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Midlife Crisis
Ambivalent, I warned you many, many months ago that the was just starting in replay and to watch the bank accounts, etc. Boy, the man is spending money like it's water. He is looking at your life style as that of someone living in the country w/a
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: WAW AF need help please by Bent @ 07/29/14 04:11 PM

One thing I wanted to ask you is this behavior my W is displaying a sign of MLC or is she just having a identity crisis! she has never been aggressive or mean spirited more like guilt ridden and depressed pretending to be happy at least around her fr
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Stand and Deliver! by LoisB @ 07/29/14 04:11 PM

Thank you Betsey :-) You da bomb. Followed up on some resumes today. There's one in a small town in Vermont that's particularly appealing for today. I have an interview at Kohl's tomorrow--hence the car repair today...It would be a drive, but I'm f
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: WAW not admitting to affair #3 by shodan @ 07/29/14 04:09 PM

not being controlling...what does that mean? - not getting angry or losing my temper - not dictating what my wife does, where she goes, etc. - not worrying about schedules, if my wife is late, etc. - if my wife takes the kids somewhere, I just say &
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Stand and Deliver! by Matt165 @ 07/29/14 04:08 PM

Hi again, The $17 vs. $12 reminded me of my W before B-day (she was already in MLC, I just didn't know it yet). I would tell my D (17 at the time) to be home by, say 12:30 AM. Before I talked to her I spoke with W and she had agreed to that time. Wel
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Line in the sand by mustardseed @ 07/29/14 04:06 PM

I love your analogy of the dark crooked path. I do feel like that. There is something hopeful about the journey even though it is absolutely terrifying. I think I had gotten past the point of feeling so sad about the possibility of this marriage endi
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: WAW not admitting to affair #3 by Starsky309 @ 07/29/14 04:05 PM

Originally Posted By: Train It's also, I'll repeat, way too easy and convenient for a WW to call boundaries "controlling." And she'll do this so that you back off your more firm stance. BINGO. It's her hole-card, and she knows it WORK
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: My H's MLC #2 by Ssarah @ 07/29/14 04:03 PM

Thank you for that LoisB, your advice is a great reminder of why I come on here to post in the first place. You all put things in perspective in a way that no one on the outside of this can. Our family and friends can say whatever they want, but as
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: My H's MLC #2 by Ssarah @ 07/29/14 04:01 PM

Hey Matt165 I was just reading your recent posts and am sorry for the place you are in. Hopefully your W will leave you alone long enough for you to regroup and be strong again. I agree with you regarding my H and his filing. The MLCer is definit
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Stand and Deliver! by Underdog @ 07/29/14 03:56 PM

Hey Heather, I'm glad you are able to see lots of this stuff with your mom and D20 clearly. Keep on keepin' on! I also have a D20 and remember clearly what a pain in the butt I was at 20. It's a rough go. My thoughts are with you. In regards to yo
Midlife Crisis
Great discussion, It may not be the OW that pulled him away. With my W she stayed a year after B-day. Every time things started to get a little bit better, she would find a way to pull away even more. I think she had gotten it into her head that runn
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: wife having an emotional affair by Atsbaby @ 07/29/14 03:53 PM

3kids, I'm sorry you're going through a tough time. Sandi2 is giving you great advice. I was the same way as you...neglected my H by focusing on kids and school not him. I'm still going through a lot with mine, but as I have backed off, he is more
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: WAW not admitting to affair #3 by Train @ 07/29/14 03:52 PM

Yeah, gay roommate! Lol. I can only speak from my own experience. But first, I think Starsky gave the best example of this on another thread just today: "You need to end your affair." <- Controlling. "I will not live in an ope
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Saving my family - Part 12 by Scorp7 @ 07/29/14 03:51 PM

You're right MB. I was thinking more if she stayed with this guy then that would be all she wrote. I would still want her back even if she had been with someone else. If we didn't have kids I don't that I could say that. We do, three very young one
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: What is "Living Life to the Fullest", Alex? #7 by Georgiabelle @ 07/29/14 03:44 PM

I'm happy this thread is so lively! This is a great discussion and I appreciate everyone's comments and insight. It is very enlightening. Wonka- as always, thank you so much for sharing your expertise and personal journey. I adore you and have
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: (NA) My confusing story by Atsbaby @ 07/29/14 03:44 PM

Today is going well. Not surprised and did not expect it, no word from H. After we were together, we went to s football practice. H ran to store and brought me back a water, which I did not ask for (baby step). We talked a few times regarding the pr
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: #42. 50 is the new 40! by Underdog @ 07/29/14 03:43 PM

I like Oriental food! But I went on a long hiatus because I had Mongolian Beef every day for 5 months when I was preggers with D17. Needless to say, she adores Chinese and Thai. I just started really liking it again. BTW, I don't believe that 50 is
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Originally Posted By: Oxford1Originally Posted By: Starsky309 I think you already know the answer to all of this, Ox. C'mon. Yup! SHUT UP!!!!! DON'T ASK!!! Yea what happened to buying that duct tape?
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Trying to stay patient- part 3 by Starsky309 @ 07/29/14 03:41 PM

Originally Posted By: claire7 If I knew my H was seeing someone else, I would absolutely not enter into a competition with her for his affection. I would just continue to be the woman (and mother of his child) only a FOOL would walk away from. .
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts what do I do (part II) by cq1 @ 07/29/14 03:40 PM

Continuing thread.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Ready for some forum help by claire7 @ 07/29/14 03:40 PM

^^^ This is exactly what happened to me.
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: Break on through to the other side by Underdog @ 07/29/14 03:40 PM

Hi all, Now that I'm through with the burial and memorial and caught up at work, I have a chance to breathe and post here. Whew. Kat, I understand your loyalty to the folks that got you through a very tough time in your life. As an employer, I woul
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: My H's MLC #2 by LoisB @ 07/29/14 03:39 PM

Quote:I have no control over that, so I need to let go. As you always say, not my sandbox ;-) Yup ^^^^^^^^^ Sarah, In my experience, it really doesn't matter what we do, what they do, whether they stand on their head while reciting the Declaration
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Trying to stay patient- part 3 by claire7 @ 07/29/14 03:36 PM

No offense, but I gotta be honest with you, Tarheel... I can't imagine I'd be willing to go on a 'date' with my H if I knew he was seeing someone else. I mean, she already dated you and committed to a life with you. And now what? Is she on the &qu
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Saving my family - Part 12 by MrBond @ 07/29/14 03:34 PM

"Obviously there's no chance of a R if she's with someone else." Not true. The majority of success stories had another person involved. All of that depends on you. If it's a deal breaker for you, then you're going to have to just sign the
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