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I know what you are dealing with. My wife got married at 17 and divorced at 18. She married the father of her first child. He physically abused her. I promised her that I never would do that, and I never have. The difference is, I emotionally ab
Originally Posted By: T0324No I will go to counseling he just wants me to pick the counselor and make the appointment. I would rather him find one. Any thoughts on my idea of you selecting 3, and then letting him pick from there. Or... try a few
Thanks all.. I will continue to remind myself to be patient. I know my heart is healing. My diversary was yesterday and it phased me in only positive ways. I'm such a different person now. I remember in the beginning of the BD how hard it was fo
Pot is really challenging. It's illegal but the kids hear about kids who got nothing but a slap on the wrist. It's zero-tolerance at the schools and sports teams, but what that means is everyone tries really hard not to catch anyone so they don't hav
Hi Shining, no canceling of parades will be done on my watch. And no beating yourself up either. I think it is so much better to have hope and belief that tomorrow will be better, than the alternative. OK, yes my W called me up to tell me she broke u
For your own health and progress, you need to detach. Have you learned about detachment? If not, learn all you can on what it looks like. It will help you be able to respond appropriately when she finds it necessary to ask you a question, and let tha
Thank you both for your replies. 25, I have been giving your post a lot of thought. I really appreciate you telling it like it is, I often read your responses to others as well and they are always spot on. I am overwhelmed with all of the chan
Well, cr@p. You are all so insightful, and correct. I have to slow down on this. I am admittedly so desperate to have my life back. But I do know deep down.....I can't. I dread waking up each day to what has become of my existence, compared to
I think I sometimes write harshly. I haven't developed the diplomacy I wish I would exercise more here. I am trying to point out things that I think I see, not to criticize, and I hope it comes across to you that way.
Thanks helpjim. Sorry to hear about the rough time you are going through. Keep your chin up!! Hard to stay dark though as we have a 3 and 5 year old. Plus she is moving back to my town and we will likely be living just yards from each other.
There is a lot of space between "continuing to express my displeasure with her move" and "pretending to support her move." Where DB'ing falls, as I've seen it expressed, is in the neutral "I respect your right to make this d
Thanks Bond...appreciate the insight from your own sitch and your guidance. I do have to learn to live my life and continue to work on me. Maybell...that's where I'm stuck. I've done some different things, but (in my mind) I always relate it to
Since this whole thing started 4 weeks ago, I have not been able to cry. Sometimes I think there must be something wrong with me. Yesterday was "Back to School" night at D6s school and after the little presentation the teacher gave, I hung
Preachin' to the choir, Maybell. I have no idea how my H. thought the microwave got cleaned, the floor mopped, the stovetop washed, the carpet vacuumed, the fridge ridded of mouldy food, or any of a few dozen other things that happen around the apar
I say stay dark, object to the divorce and improve yourself. My case has wrinkles because we fuses any contact at all I don't know what to do. I am dating someone for the companionship and to keep my strength for this stressful divorce. She has ha
Originally Posted By: T0324He really is pushing for counseling. He still knows I'm on the fence but I agreed to counseling. Just my perception, you don't seem too keen on counseling. Or am I reading you wrong?
Meghan, I have no idea either, but am sending good thoughts your way. Someone will have sound advice and in the meantime here's a ((hug)). Good for you for thinking this through and letting someone else weigh in before responding.
Even though things are going relatively well with W, I am really really questioning if it is worth the effort. I try to look at it as if she is someone I just met, how and would I handle it. The answer I keep coming up with is I would not be puttin
Old thread: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2480664&page=1 I could use some advice. H. just emailed me to ask how I'm doing. He said he's not really sure what to say, and that he probably knows how I
"Maybell, she doesn't want to be reminded of the affair? How does she avoid thinking about it when she reaches out to me?" I wasn't sure if this question was serious or not. Of course she doesn't want to be reminded of the A. That's why sh
From your previous thread Quote: Well to be honest, I think her getting used to it is all a front really. She said she is jealous of her. I also let WAW know that things haven't really progressed with the new girl, no kissing, no sex, etc. That we a