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Active Topics | Active Posts | Unanswered Posts Past 24 hours | Past 48 hours | Past 7 days
Forum   Subject
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: 25yearsmlc 10 yrs later I File D (part 4) by Zues126 @ 06/17/17 10:23 AM

25, I think I've solved it. You know, the one thing about support and dividing assets is that we can't have families forced to choose between abuse and poverty. I get that. There must be a minimal living arrangement that will allow them to protect
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: Leaving Castle Caladan by Zues126 @ 06/17/17 10:08 AM

Oh, one more thing. In regards to XW...she is a great mom to the kids. The fact is that there is her and me, and there is her and the kids. She is great with the kids. I am very blessed and appreciative of that. The her and me part doesn't matte
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: Leaving Castle Caladan by Zues126 @ 06/17/17 10:01 AM

PS- Jelly- I know you are stealthily reading this. Thank you for following. I won't bump your thread and force a reply, but no one has forgotten about you. Hope you are having a good weekend. If you don't know what else to do, shoot some pool
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: Sunny Days Ahead by Zues126 @ 06/17/17 10:00 AM

OK Sunny, I posted my updates, time for yours. I had to dig this thread up from underneath a T-Rex skeleton! What's cooking? Update when you can. And in all seriousness, no matter how often you update, I am really glad you remain a member of the
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: Is there room for a chair more? by Zues126 @ 06/17/17 09:56 AM

Painter, I'm having a few moments of silence for your loss. I just bombed out a long post on my thread, you can skip to the last few paragraphs if you'd like...but I shared some thoughts about where I'm at now. I think each day it is ok to honor yo
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Here again part 7 by 25yearsmlc @ 06/17/17 09:53 AM

What Zues ^^^ said. Let the dust settle! I literally want you to download one of those free meditation apps so you can take 10 minutes a day to focus on one thing, like releasing anxiety or breathing. I'm not a gimmicky person, but it has hel
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: Leaving Castle Caladan by Zues126 @ 06/17/17 09:47 AM

Hi Sunny! Hello gang! I'm good and I'm good. What I mean is that things are going swimmingly right now, truly never better. But beyond that, I am feeling very grounded. I understand that this will change at some point. This is life, and there w
Midlife Crisis
I agree with all your great advice. I definitely do need to live a life. For now I play in a new band (sorta thing), but still spend much time getting my dads house ready for sale since he passed unexpectedly in February
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Limerence and My Situation by parkema @ 06/17/17 09:13 AM

Thank you all for your advice I'll take it on board. I'll continue to: DR Keep as dark has I can. Keep working on me for me. GAL as best I can. Detach although I have issues about it. What I wont do: Look to another relationship - when I feel I can
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Here again part 7 by Zues126 @ 06/17/17 08:54 AM

Quote:His behavior is mentally abusive, what kind of father/husband would rather party than caring to his own children when he know that his wife is in need of help. This is indeed horrible behavior. And I don't think you'll find anyone more oppos
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Limerence and My Situation by 25yearsmlc @ 06/17/17 08:01 AM

Originally Posted By: parkema25yearsmlc, What else would it be..? I totally agree your comment on the LBS being in limerence and I possibly am if you mean I have an infatuation of my W yes I do, that I have bonded with her and crystallised that, ye
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Here again part 7 by Coconut @ 06/17/17 07:55 AM

TO, I'm not minimalizing the amount of work your having to do... But I would of given anything to walk away from my M with my step son, dogs, and any other responsibilities that existed in our M.. Instead, because he was my step son, and I had no l
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Betrayed Spouse - Round 2 by Coconut @ 06/17/17 07:31 AM

Originally Posted By: KaizenOriginally Posted By: dale165Latest is that W asked me last night why I seem so distant. Because Im not interested in having a relationship with you while you are in a relationship with another man. Sometimes I wish ther
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: "Dropping the Rope" by Cadet @ 06/17/17 07:23 AM

Originally Posted By: sandi2 How long did it take me to realize I was experiencing limerence? Hummmm, I would have to go back through my old threads......b/c it was ten years ago and I was still in some fog when I joined the board. I had the right
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: You guys aren't going to beleive this 5 by Coconut @ 06/17/17 07:22 AM

Hmm, what's your goal? Is it to save your M or just get support for moving forward? I say that cause your wife reached out to temp check, and you kind of Vomited in her face. We all know what she said is crap, but if you throw it in her face she
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Betrayed Spouse - Round 2 by dale165 @ 06/17/17 07:22 AM

Thanks Ownit I sure will. Wife has told me repeatedly I don't know how to love and love is not natural for me. Maybe a doc can help with CBT. Maybe meds, who knows. I tried some serotonin meds for a week several years ago and it made me tired a
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: "Dropping the Rope" by sandi2 @ 06/17/17 06:58 AM

Quote:As you know my original thread was about limerence and I find it interesting that once you gained an understanding of it's behaviours you began to get your life back into some kind of order. Can I ask a few questions..? 1.How long did it take
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Here again part 7 by skyhigh @ 06/17/17 06:49 AM

I am so angry at your husband right now... His behavior is mentally abusive, what kind of father/husband would rather party than caring to his own children when he know that his wife is in need of help. Make sure to document his actions and his w
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Offering Prayer Part II by Stunned @ 06/17/17 06:33 AM

Stunned I pray daily for the lord to soften my W's heart for me and for the lord and for reconciliation. And for All the negative influences in her life to be silenced and removed. I pray that God would expose her if she walks in deceit, and to rem
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Here again part 7 by OwnIt @ 06/17/17 06:27 AM

TO: I think you are trying to guilt him with the kids and needing help because you can't let go despite what you say (I don't doubt that you need the help, but you are trying to control what it looks like). He left. He doesn't want to be with you.
Midlife Crisis
My suggestion is sit quiet and determine which parts of this you can control and among those put some boundaries in place that will give you some sanity. For example, when it comes to his coming to the house, you have options there. You can tell hi
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: You guys aren't going to beleive this 5 by OwnIt @ 06/17/17 06:18 AM

That's exactly what it sounds like. She's telling you not to date and move on while she does her thing. Nice deal for her.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: On Higher Ground by mleigh4 @ 06/17/17 06:16 AM

Congrats to your S graduation! Can you believe he is heading to high school? It goes so fast. Interesting about the books. I hope he reads them and takes something away from it. M
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: You guys aren't going to beleive this 5 by Sotto @ 06/17/17 06:15 AM

Hi Thornton, do you see how the loop is going around again from her end? My view would be don't even engage with her on that stuff and stick with validation only - I'm sorry you feel that way, I'm sure if we both reflect on things there are ways we
Midlife Crisis
Yes Gordie, that's who he is now. A decent father would never understand how someone could do this to their child, but then again I am infuriated by the WAWs and WWs I read about on this site. Makes me want to apologize for my gender. In the end i
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