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Forum   Subject
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Igit newbie needs help part 3 by pilot @ 08/31/14 11:46 AM

Well lets hope your W figures that out soon, for everyone's sake! Sadly it is something THEY have to figure out.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Igit newbie needs help part 3 by igit @ 08/31/14 11:39 AM

Pilot, you are so rt. These WAW are in so much pain they will do anything to find happiness. The problem is they don't realize that hapiness is an inside job. All a D is going to do when u have kids is trade in one problem for a set of problems alot
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell IX by Maybell @ 08/31/14 11:27 AM

Antsiness is partly related to H. But I do think I'd be antsy if he were here too. So maybe it's him, and being impatient; and spending yesterday alone recharging so now I'm ready for my plans to get in motion; wanting my house to be like I want it
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Igit newbie needs help part 3 by pilot @ 08/31/14 11:19 AM

No, it is not good for the kids to see. I am not sure my situation is any better as the kids split time with my W and I. I certainly hate it more than anything that I do not get to see my kids every day. And being dragged from one home to another
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Can't decide by LITB @ 08/31/14 11:18 AM

Joe gave you some sound advice. Go with the plan and make the best of this opportunity. You didn't make a grave mistake. You are just trying to find your way. From what I gather, you are trying to get him to snap out of his fog. I did the same typ
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Settlement signed. Now what? by NewB3 @ 08/31/14 11:11 AM

Great article on detaching. Thank you!
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Keeping it real by Zues126 @ 08/31/14 11:06 AM

Sorry to bump...I'm no more important than anyone else. But this is one situation I feel is critical I handle right and I'm stumped.
Midlife Crisis
Quote:How do you reason with a MLCer?Really? I think you scream into a pillow and somehow they hear it. Like riding a unicorn What you seem to be doing is learning to co-parent. Considering three daughters, that may come in handy right? Each of
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: barely holding on - 3 by u-turn @ 08/31/14 10:56 AM

MLP. I know it is not time for relationship talks. I don't know if it was productive but I know so little about her any more and this was at least some information. I keep telling myself to detach...probably said it 100 times in my head yesterday.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Wife Still in MLC but has now left #3 by LoisB @ 08/31/14 10:52 AM

One other thing...:-) When I was in the thick of it...the pain, rejection, desolation, despair, etc... Sometimes, I imagined myself a year or so ahead...imagined my life back to OK and back to settled and full of joy. I imagined myself triumphant o
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Wife Still in MLC but has now left #3 by AJM @ 08/31/14 10:50 AM

Quote:It's darker and colder and less "magical". If my W can become so horrible, change so completely so quickly, even as I did everything I could to be supportive, to do the "right" things what else could happen? Even if I do eve
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Igit newbie needs help part 3 by igit @ 08/31/14 10:47 AM

Pilot, you are so rt. My w is just making it so difficult to keep PMA anytime I am around her. She is just so cold and miserable. It's definitely not good for the kids to see.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Wife Still in MLC but has now left #3 by LoisB @ 08/31/14 10:46 AM

Matt, I hope you can try to accept yourself where you are. Everything you are feeling is perfectly normal and a part of this process. You had this person in the backdrop of your life for 30 years? Even if she was unavailable and depressed for much
Midlife Crisis
Maybell, I did pity him. While I was disliking him. And yes, two pro photographers were there snapping away and a lot in my direction. (They use them as promo shots for the band, venue, event, personal work, etc.) So I hope people let me know if
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: WAH - chapter 3 by pilot @ 08/31/14 10:34 AM

Thanks cq1! It is nice to hear good things about one's self. Lisa, you are doing great. I knew your H would be a puppy dog around you. And as much as i know you are feeling great about the prospects of reuniting, and as much as I really really ho
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts WAW, she had an affair, separating to "think" by jb13529 @ 08/31/14 10:31 AM

Hi all, the fact that I am here means life just got real tough real quick. My wife and I have been together for 7 years, married for 2. About 3 weeks ago we got into a discussion and she said she needed space, that she never felt like she got to &quo
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Claire-Is DB Worth It? Part 6 by Maybell @ 08/31/14 10:25 AM

Wow! Have a great day!
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Claire-Is DB Worth It? Part 6 by claire7 @ 08/31/14 10:24 AM

Tracking more positives: 1) On his way to drop of D3 this morning, he asked if I would like him to pick up breakfast for me 2) At drop off, he stayed to chat for a bit-- mostly just spending time with D3 (not really a conversation between us), but s
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Old dog seeks new trick 3 by Maybell @ 08/31/14 10:23 AM

Old Dog, you shouldn't have any expectations, remember? It really doesn't matter if she wants to work on it or not. You can move her without her realizing it just by making your 180s to be healthier and more like the person you want to be, GAL (I'm
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell IX by Georgiabelle @ 08/31/14 10:21 AM

I do, Maybell. I clean out closets or jump rope to get some of that energy channeled. Hope you have a great time whatever you decide to do!
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Not sure what to do by claire7 @ 08/31/14 10:18 AM

Bob, Can you clarify? I don't see in your texts where you specifically said, "I'd like to see him, when would be a good time?" True that she didn't come out and offer that to you... but you also didn't clearly ask for that...at least n
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Igit newbie needs help part 3 by pilot @ 08/31/14 10:15 AM

I feel for you igit. None of what your W does makes sense. For that matter no WAW does anything that makes sense, so no point in dwelling on what they do. Keep your focus on yourself and making the improvements on yourself. As tough as it is, you
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Can't decide by secondt @ 08/31/14 10:14 AM

Thanks for you 2cents because I was feeling that I had made a grave mistake. When I have been around my H lately I haven't even acknowledged the A. This I guess is my form of detachment. Rightly or wrongly. I really appreciate your help- please c
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell IX by Maybell @ 08/31/14 10:14 AM

Feeling antsy, with a crazy urge to make something happen, not necessarily related to H. Just something. I'm trying to use the energy to get my house in order, and maybe I'll throw a small BBQ or go for a run this afternoon, but it feels like not eno
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Old dog seeks new trick 3 by Old Dog @ 08/31/14 10:12 AM

I brought up the finances issue this morning. How this year she had paid very little into our joint account, missing five months including nothing in the past three months. I said I had always trusted her implicitly but felt like I was beginning to
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