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For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Walk away partner after 22 years . WAW Ltr by 25yearsmlc @ Yesterday at 08:01 PM

Here is a letter written by a WAW. In the letter, (which is Not addressed to HER own h, but to another LBH around here), she explains to the LBH how she identifies with his WAW. See if you think any of this below could have been written by Your wif
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: First post-help needed-wife affair by MrBond @ Yesterday at 08:00 PM

Have you read the DB or DR books yet?
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: First post-help needed-wife affair by AWAW @ Yesterday at 07:58 PM

Read the 180 rules. Stick to it. Do not contact, there are no kids so this should be easier. It is hard but it is for YOUR sanity. Hit the gym and GAL. Once you genuinely focus on you she will notice and you will benefit no matter the outcome. If you
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Makingmagic, where'dja go?? by ericmsant2 @ Yesterday at 07:55 PM

MM Just wondering...did you ever resolve the business issues? Did you end up securing a legal document that grants you a portion of the business? If not, then it seems like you are right where I last left you... Waiting....waiting....waiting...for
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Walk away partner after 22 years . First post by 25yearsmlc @ Yesterday at 07:53 PM

South, I don't mean to seem as if I'm badgering you here. But I wrote a rather long post, imagining I was your wife. I'm hoping you can look at it again, and really imagine HER writing this and see if it might be a lot of what SHE feels/believes, ev
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Wifes severe depression, MLC, and suicide attempt by ericmsant2 @ Yesterday at 07:51 PM

LT, Quote:It must be tough after two years to not have co parenting with your ex. How do you even do it? After two years? It’s been longer than that and I do not co parent with my ex. I parallel parent. Big difference. I learned that nothing I say
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: still holding on - 4 by u-turn @ Yesterday at 07:46 PM

Thanks again PeterV2 - I am going to do this. I know we use to talk about everything - all the time. That comfort level has been gone for a while though and it almost seems awkward to try again with the elephant in the room. But I will. I don't reall
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: First post-help needed-wife affair by sandi2 @ Yesterday at 07:45 PM

Quote:I told her i wanted our marriage and would do anything for it. IMHO, it might be better if you will not state this in these exact words again (since you've already told her twice). It would be better to say something like, "I believe if
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: It's me again...and again...and again. by whatisis @ Yesterday at 07:44 PM

I'm just hoping that she's not crazy lol!
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need advice please 2 by rd500 @ Yesterday at 07:43 PM

Another update. W has found flat Moving in about a week. She told her boss and I feel now it's out of the bag. I have been busy with kids and changing bills etc to my name. Very down as W leaving now a reality She has spent last two evening
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: To DB or not to DB, is it really a question? by MrBond @ Yesterday at 07:39 PM

Got it. Okay, the most important thing to do is to read the WHOLE book. Too often people get the books and only read the parts that they THINK just applies to them. You need to read it all to get a whole picture of how your WAS thinks. Now, as for y
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Wife Still in MLC but has now left #5 by ericmsant2 @ Yesterday at 07:37 PM

Matt I tried to post this yesterday but the boards were down…… these are a few things from your last post over at your old thread. Quote:For her to tell me to my face that she was fine with what we agreed to and then when it came down to actually
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: H's MLC #5 by job @ Yesterday at 07:30 PM

You did very well w/the recent conversation. I know it's hard to look and treat them as roommates because your heart is still trying to tell you that it's your h and hoping against hope, that he will suddenly revert back to the many you love. It ta
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Old dog seeks new trick 4 by MrBond @ Yesterday at 07:29 PM

"And I know, I know, I know, and yet I still have trouble doing it. " If you can get out of bed to go to C, you can get out of bed to GAL. The actions don't have to be big ones. Start by going out for a walk at a park. Then go to the coffe
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Navigating in Separation Limbo by shodan @ Yesterday at 07:28 PM

This is a tough sitch but also similar to many others. I agree with the others that you need to follow sand's rules. Detaching and GALing is very hard. We all know what you mean. You feel horrible, your chest hurts and her attitude and behavior con
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: It's me again...and again...and again. by BeginningAgain @ Yesterday at 07:25 PM

Originally Posted By: whatisisOK, lady wants to start texting...moving forward lol! Well here is hoping that this could be the start of a beautiful thing! BA
The Do A 180 Workshop
Jump to new posts Re: Is it too late for the 180? by twb66 @ Yesterday at 07:21 PM

Yes, she is still at home. She never left and neither did I. I have asked/demanded full disclosure and she says she has told me everything. I have trouble believing that. Her former friend and brother have both said that I don't know anything tha
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Old dog seeks new trick 4 by Old Dog @ Yesterday at 07:20 PM

Originally Posted By: MrBond"Sounds like an excuse for laziness - Mr Bond would probably agree - but it's not just that. It is real, and has held me back too long. It's the thing I want to address when I next get to go counselling." It's n
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: MLC W Dates Lotsa Men, Part IV by Wet @ Yesterday at 07:19 PM

My W called me today, and called me "hun". It's her first use of a pet name for me in over 2 months. She must really like me! I'm sorry for the sarcasm. She said she can't pay her rent and so was out looking to find some money from people
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Blindsided but finding my way (part 4) by rppfl @ Yesterday at 07:17 PM

Originally Posted By: labug In a nutshell, my H said pretty much the same things and he was right about most of them I'm sorry to say. So labug, how did you deal with what you recognized about yourself? Awareness is a first step, but where do I
The Do A 180 Workshop
Jump to new posts Re: Is it too late for the 180? by bdub @ Yesterday at 07:15 PM

Hang in there twb. There will be a really knowledgeable vet around soon to help you start your journey. Have you asked for transparency? Is your W still living at home? It appears to me like you may be pretty fortunate. You caught it early and y
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: To DB or not to DB, is it really a question? by Shakspr @ Yesterday at 07:14 PM

Originally Posted By: MrBondMaybe I missed something. On Jim's thread, you wrote just yesterday ... "I hadn't found DB/DR, yet." Yet today, you wrote, "I read DR. Hadn't read the infidelity section because I didn't think that was the
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: My Wife Filed Today by Wet @ Yesterday at 07:13 PM

Don't do anything without talking to your attorney first. That's what he/she is there for. Trust in the process.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need help by dying @ Yesterday at 07:12 PM

so today i woke up with so much anxiety I felt like I was going to throw up. tonight is a counseling session and I'm paranoid. granted the past couple days have been "ok" but I feel the counseling is making my wife feel belittled and put
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: To DB or not to DB, is it really a question? by Shakspr @ Yesterday at 07:11 PM

Thank you, raliced. I am slowing down, and will initiate no more convo with W for at least 48 hours about anything other than who is making dinner. It's not the worst day of my life. That was 8/6. In reality, at least this makes what she had be
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