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Active Topics | Active Posts | Unanswered Posts Past 24 hours | Past 48 hours | Past 7 days
Forum   Subject
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Vanilla Fudged 19 by Vanilla @ Yesterday at 09:14 PM

Z, PP, thank you for your support and comfort. RD, my special friend, much peace to you and your fabulous family, I think of your joy and life together and it gives me great peace. Sunny, lovely to see you posting, thank you. V
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Step 1: Detach. GAL. STFU. by CaliGuy @ Yesterday at 09:13 PM

BE Its a start, the changes you are making have to be for you. your W will be very critical of them .. just as she stated up there and the more she iwll think about them the more she will think its a trick/act as she mentioned. That whole leppord an
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Vanilla Fudged 19 by Vanilla @ Yesterday at 09:10 PM

Gan , Jim I wanted quickly to address the posting issue as I suspect their are more board members who find this difficult. There could be a number of reasons I think, but this is how I see it. I decided (rightly or wrongly) to be completely open.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Looking inside by mleigh4 @ Yesterday at 09:10 PM

Hi Caliguy. You know, all men SHOULD have some little boy in them. It brings fun, right? It's one of the things I love about H, despite the anxiety it brings on. Yes, I shake my head, but it is usually while smiling! And I agree, it was great to
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: WW/WAW Looking for advice from the pros (Sandi) by Cadet @ Yesterday at 09:03 PM

New thread http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2585310#Post2585310
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: New here- please give me advice on how to proceed by photoka @ Yesterday at 09:03 PM

Sandi, your detachment advice is helping me! I was thinking of it more like withdrawal. Since BD H has taken down Facebook pics of me and blocks anything he is tagged in with me, but loves to post pics of himself hanging out with his friends.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Thread for Prowl #2 by Cadet @ Yesterday at 09:01 PM

This thread is for Prowl Previous thread http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2583079#Post2583079
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Working on it, but affair hasn't ended yet... by CaliGuy @ Yesterday at 08:59 PM

T33 Ok . holidays are over ... what GAL activities are you doing for the next week? (Stay out of your W's head this week .. do your thing)
Midlife Crisis
Good for you! While it's nice to hear something positive, the odds are good that he's just having a momentary peek out of the tunnel, or the girlfriend is gone for a few days, or they had a fight and he's just checking to make sure if Plan B is stil
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Losing hope by kippz @ Yesterday at 08:58 PM

Originally Posted By: JefeOriginally Posted By: CaliGuy From what I have learned/read ... Nope .. don't ask, and at this point he should not tell. I read a column on a couple who attended a marriage retreat, the man confessed to an A he had 20 yea
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: WW/WAW Looking for advice from the pros (Sandi) by asitis @ Yesterday at 08:56 PM

Prowl, I've been there, as have many of us, on being unable to face the day and being unable to stop crying. Seriously, there are anti-anxiety meds that work really, really fast that can get you back to functional and give you a bit of breathing ro
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Step 1: Detach. GAL. STFU. by Fogg @ Yesterday at 08:56 PM

Originally Posted By: BEClemI stayed totally calm. I validated her by saying that "I completely understand why you would believe that I am trying to pull off an act. It is hurtful for you to say it but it does not make me angry and I understan
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Pushing towards mediation...while doing DBs by EBLFRM @ Yesterday at 08:55 PM

Thanks Theoden. I really appreciate your input. Based on my research #1 is already in force...I told her I was not moving out. I have also done #2...since I am in MA, it's a no-fault state, so not much there in terms of being able to get the case
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Yup, it stands for Rising Above It - II by Vanilla @ Yesterday at 08:52 PM

I agree with Ralliced 1000 times V
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: seperated 4 months by help67 @ Yesterday at 08:52 PM

Thanks v, I hope you are right, but it is not a typical affair. Om is married, but in an open marriage (POLYAMOROUS) its called. So his w doesnt care, he doesnt care if my w sees other people, and apparantly my w is happy. They started out as frien
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Coping strategies that work when they step out by CaliGuy @ Yesterday at 08:52 PM

Last Listen to Sandi ... your W is seriously hooked on that online drug that just got a huge boost when it left the cyber world and became a real world tangible rush. On your Birthday? Seriously .. drop the rope she is obviously all about herself
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Husband A for one year by 4mykid @ Yesterday at 08:52 PM

It is raining her so no plans with the kids. they want to watch a movie so that may turn into the plan while he is out working in the garage! Needing some guidance on detatching!
For Newcomers
Thanks asitis Cali law has six months separation before finalized. No OM as far as me or anyone knows ...anesthesiology school has her stressed and depressed which exasperated this all . I won't fight the ring it cost me 14k+ but not worth it Cali la
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Working on it, but affair hasn't ended yet... by t33 @ Yesterday at 08:48 PM

Thank you everyone for chiming in. Vanilla, u-turn, sandi2, and Bob723. I very much appreciate the support and words of encouragement. It is a confusing time and it is difficult to apply the proper DB techniques at various times. I appreciate eve
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Little Cloud of Dust - PigPen & The WAW (3) by Vanilla @ Yesterday at 08:47 PM

PP Those that relapse are abstaining not recovering. The stats on those recovering are as much as 60% clean after 5 years. The recovers accept and know this is a management issue and believe that is a life long journey. They work their steps and bui
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: In the fog by pimouse @ Yesterday at 08:47 PM

Interesting day for me. A couple of weeks ago i went to a birthday party and left after I felt made uncomfortable by one of the guest. I knew this guy as he's my friend XH. Today his XW (my friend) told me that on that day he was laughing at me as I
For Newcomers
Thanks all, just don't know if it will work she texted today that I'll get D papers this week , also with no child to link us she will have no reason to contact me once the D is finalized, bc even now she doesn't even want me around when she comes b
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Husband A for one year by 4mykid @ Yesterday at 08:45 PM

well I was successful at not calling or texting him today. He did text me at Noon asked if i was having a good day. convo went like this H:having a good day? M:yes busy but good got a lot done u? H:garbage lol (he was picking up garbage he works at a
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Step 1: Detach. GAL. STFU. by BEClem @ Yesterday at 08:45 PM

Man. Really great feedback today guys. Thank you so much. Each of you touched on her friend. I agree with everyone's assessment. If I set boundaries it will blow up in my face. Not the right tactic for my sitch. Cali wrote this: "I agr
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Little Cloud of Dust - PigPen & The WAW (3) by Wonka @ Yesterday at 08:44 PM

PP, Okay...the MC session is just around the corner. Yeah, no pressure, right? If I may, can I ask that you please let us know how you plan to address W during the first session? My initial thought is to pull out a piece of paper where you've w
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