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Active Topics | Active Posts | Unanswered Posts Past 24 hours | Past 48 hours | Past 7 days
Forum   Subject
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Offering Prayer by bigybiz @ Yesterday at 08:08 PM

I must say I really need to be thankful. I spent some time today ready a few other people's posts today and I realize how lucky I have it. I read many stories of people who are struggling with affairs, long distances, interfering relatives, blood thi
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: GAL going well. Need help with LRT and 180 by bigybiz @ Yesterday at 08:02 PM

Melo & Rose8888. Thanks for your post. I must say I really need to be thankful. I spent some time today ready a few other people's posts today and I realize how lucky I have it. I read many stories of people who are struggling with affairs, long
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need advice by BluWave @ Yesterday at 08:01 PM

Ralph, That's true. My H did and said some ridiculous cr-p when he was in the fog. It's almost laughable now! And he easily got a rise out of me! But with practice and preparation, comes improvement! It is also a part of detachment, to take back the
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife finally admitted EA. by Natus @ Yesterday at 07:29 PM

Okay, maybe i got the meaning of detaching wrong. I thought detach meant to detach my emotions from her. So i'd be less needy, reactive and always thinking of her. I have been doing things for myself and she has just recently mentioned that she has
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need advice by Ralph88 @ Yesterday at 07:24 PM

Blu.. You make it sound so easy... I too need to run the scenarios through my head.. But it's hard to think of everything these crazies can through at you.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife finally admitted EA. by JimKao @ Yesterday at 07:24 PM

Detaching is not about giving up on her. It is focusing on you and making yourself better and more attractive. Go back and read the threads on detaching. Make improvements for yourself and in turn if your W sees those improvements then you may hav
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Headed for D - Trying to move on by JimKao @ Yesterday at 07:20 PM

This afternoon I get home from work. My night again with the boys. Went to pick up prescriptions for S7. Texted STBXW that pharmacy lost the script. STBXW gets all upset because I dropped it off yesterday when she said she would take care of it.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife finally admitted EA. by Natus @ Yesterday at 07:19 PM

How do you detach? i been trying and the only thing i can think of is give up on her. Give up the marriage. Is there a way to really detach while still working to save M?
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need advice by BluWave @ Yesterday at 07:16 PM

You cannot break her side of the pattern, because you have no control over how she will react or what she will do. Read about codependency, because this is an example of that. The good news is that you CAN control everything that you say and do. You
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Friends? leads to M success???? by Ralph88 @ Yesterday at 07:16 PM

I like your thinking.. You seem to have it going for you.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: New Couple, Same Old Story 2 by Ralph88 @ Yesterday at 07:11 PM

If you google emotionally immature people, it's the first article to come up. I don't wanna bust any forum rules by posting.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Friends? leads to M success???? by e04355 @ Yesterday at 07:11 PM

thats the thing, i have pulled the rug out from under her. i havent been nice lately. i have been very distanced. she uses every oportunity, to talk to me. and every time, she says its over.....and i say ok, do what you gotta do. and then i get a t
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife finally admitted EA. by tl2 @ Yesterday at 07:10 PM

First principles: believe nothing they say and only half of what they do. You can't be played if you detach and live YOUR life without keying on what she says/does.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife finally admitted EA. by Natus @ Yesterday at 07:05 PM

Okay thanks JimKao. I guess i wonder if im being played, the nice happy wife who initiates texts and conversation etc then suddenly later on in the day complete opposite.
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: Wayward wife help!!! by cubebot @ Yesterday at 06:44 PM

DBnoob, Man, that's a rough story. Listen to Lim and the advice you have received. KEEP POSTING, it is therapeutic and good to get as much advise as possible. SEE A LAWYER ASAP!! You can probably get a consultation for free or fairly cheap. You
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife finally admitted EA. by JimKao @ Yesterday at 06:41 PM

Natus, Temp checking is her taking action to see if it pushes any buttons to get you to react negatively so she has more excuses to spew all over you and justify why the M will not work. Hope some of the vets can explain/define more appropriately.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: New Couple, Same Old Story 2 by JimKao @ Yesterday at 06:37 PM

Ralph88 I am sure one way or another most WAS's are emotionally immature. What was the article title? Would love to read it and see how close my WW fits the description.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife finally admitted EA. by Natus @ Yesterday at 06:15 PM

Can someone help me out, What are the signs of W temp checking? or the like. Im a little confused at my wifes behaviour, light cheery and jovial (with me) during the day then ice queen at night. I know i shouldnt be reading into it much and focus on
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife is moving out :( by DigIt @ Yesterday at 06:06 PM

Thanks for the offer. I may very well take you up on it.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Tunnel or cocoon, I'm giving birth to myself by kml @ Yesterday at 06:05 PM

Quote:I think part of this process will be healing from H and also exploring the unresolved feelings for exbf at some point before I can move on. Ummm....last time I looked, exBF wasn't beating down your door. Let's face it - if he really was the
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Tunnel or cocoon, I'm giving birth to myself by bttrfly @ Yesterday at 05:53 PM

Posting an update. Had a realization yesterday. I was very out of sorts, couldn't figure out why.. Felt very down and negative. Talking on phone to my brother from another mother helped clarify things. I was so down because I'm heartbroken when my
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: How to rekindle love? by Rose888 @ Yesterday at 05:50 PM

Phoebe and Blu, thanks so much for the good thoughts! Honestly, in the past, H has put more effort into this area. I've been selfish and clueless. It's a bad combination. I have had my "come to Jesus" moment and have seen my failures in th
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: W still at home, how to proceed? by LiM @ Yesterday at 05:44 PM

Originally Posted By: ImAwake If the end goal is to have a better relationship and be supportive of my wife and get the same support back...at what point should I start giving the good things back to her? The affection and love that I have for her no
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: What Should I be Doing? by Ralph88 @ Yesterday at 05:27 PM

That sounds better than your original description and her response.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: WAW still angry, moved out, D on the way? by SadHub @ Yesterday at 05:20 PM

Hi Phoebe, Thank you for checking in on me. It was a challenging day, but it is going to end on a great note. I have both of my girls here and we are excited to have some fun together. I will journal this evening some of my challenges, but now
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