Frustrated, nothing seems to apply for my situatio - 04/11/19 07:20 PM
Hi, I've read Divorce Busting and many of these discussions but I am floundering. We will be married 34 years in May. We've had ups and downs and I've had breast cancer which lead to sex starved marriage. Last September I found out my H had sent disturbing emails to old college gf. She contacted me because she had seen my FB and blogs and things didn't add up. He portrayed me as an abusive alcholic, have me the sleep disorder he suffers from. He thrashed and bangs, falls out of bed, shouts and has given me some bruises. I moveto another bed when it gets too bad. He claimed I had broken his ribs, passed out drunk and then in last email said my cancer was back and I only had a few weeks to live and( ???why?) Moving to Canada for treatment... It was like a punch in stomach to read. Bizarre and painful. I also discovered he had a profile on Zoosk a dating site. I was hurt and terrified and confronted him about site but not my knowledge of emails because his ex asked me not too. She didn't want to be involved or contacted further by him. He said he wanted a divorce and I started DB. He and I made an agreement to try. He is still on Zoosk...and I get informed, every so often by friends of mine that " warn" me that they have seen him in there, he has even unknowingly flirted with several. I teach dog training classes, am active in many forums and locally rather well known. He then gets involved in texting relationships and yes I snoop. When it gets to hot, I have sometimes let the other women know I exist.....and several times they have just discovered me and tell him off. We both appear on each others FB etc. Plus we do things together! He gets furious and nasty when it happens but doesn't know how much I do know or if I had a hand in it and on DB advice I have been riding out what I hope is a MLC. I have tried to change my reactions etc. He tells these OW some truly odd lies. The ones I have become friends with day he still tried to contact, swears he's divorcing me. Then weYet we are in many ways doing better. We teach a class together. We go out on weekends and take walks. We are having sex. This is hard for me but lube and fake it till I make it. But he is Still searching and texting Other Women!