How To Tell Your Spouse About Your Affair [video]

If you have had an affair and you decide to tell your spouse about it or your spouse has already discovered some of the facts, you will want to know how to share the information in the least hurtful way.  The video below will help you break the news to your spouse. If you decide to confessing your infidelity, you need to include all of the details, and not let the facts leak out piece meal over time, because when new information is revealed, the wounds reopen, slowing down any real progress.

My full advice is seen in the video below.

Michele Weiner Davis is the creator of the Divorce Busting Centers, learn more on how you can solve marriage problems and stop divorce and recover from infidelity. Follow me on Twitter @divorcebusting, add my Divorce Busting Facebook Page, and subscribe to the Divorce Busting YouTube Videos for more advice and upcoming marriage saving events.

Full Transcript:

Hi my name is Michele Weiner-Davis and I’m the founder of

Today I’m going to talk about healing from Infidelity, in particular I’m going to talk about how to you confess the information about your affair, if you’ve had one, to your spouse. Or, if your spouse has discovered that you’ve had an affair, what are you supposed to say.
One of the biggest mistakes that people who’ve had an affair make when they’re telling the truth about the affair, is that they don’t say the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

They let the information leak out little by little. Partly they do this because they’re feeling very shameful and embarrassed. They also don’t want to hurt their spouse. And it’s difficult to tell that kind of truth. They know it’s going to be devastating. But what’s even more devastating, far more devastating, is when your spouse hears a little bit of the information and then a week later, or a month later, or even six months later they find out more details. That’s when they want to throw in the towel because they feel at least you’re coming clean when they find out later on that they haven’t gotten the whole story. They get so frustrated, so hurt, and it’s re-traumatizing.
So if you’re in this position and you’re about to share this information and confess the affair, do yourself and do your spouse a favor: say what happened, tell the whole truth. It’ll be hard, but get your cards out on the table, and then deal with that. You’ll be able to move forward just leave nothing unsaid. It’s the best advice I can give you.  Try it.

About mwd27

Michele Weiner-Davis, MSW is an internationally renowned relationship expert, best-selling author, marriage therapist, and professional speaker who specializes in helping people change their lives and improve important relationships. Among the first in her field to courageously speak out about the pitfalls of unnecessary divorce, Michele has been active in spearheading the now popular movement urging couples to make their marriages work and keep their families together. She is the author of seven books including her best-selling books, DIVORCE BUSTING: A Step-by-Step Approach to Making Your Marriage Loving Again, and THE SEX-STARVED MARRIAGE: A Couple's Guide to Boosting Their Marriage Libido. Michele's work has been featured in major newspapers such as the New York Times, Los Angeles Times, Washington Post, Chicago Tribune, Wall Street Journal, and magazines such as Time, Redbook, Ladies Home Journal, Essence, Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Woman's Day, Men's Health, New Woman, and McCall's. Michele is a marriage expert on Redbook's advisory board, and She has made countless media appearances on shows such as Oprah, 48 Hours, 20/20, The Today Show, CBS This Morning, CBS Evening News, CNN, and Bill O'Reilly. Michele's Keeping Love Alive program aired on PBS stations nationwide. She recently completed a reality based show for the BBC about helping couples save their marriages. Michele maintains that her true expertise in helping couples have great relationships is derived from first-hand experience. She and her husband have been married for more than thirty years.
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